What truly fills the void inside one’s heart? Why does it feel like you don’t know what’s next when you’ve lost what you had last? Why is vulnerability considered such a bad thing? When you give into change in a relationship to cater to another’s feelings, is this the moment where things go sour? What causes one to give 80% while the other gives 20%?  Is it better to be single or deal with situations that create despair amongst a loving soul? These are questions that I ask in order to create a conscious correlation to complicated situations.

I can’t answer these questions for everyone, but I can definitely say I have experienced some of these feelings myself and have concluded that every situation has a unique solution!  In order to fill void in one’s heart, one must figure out why the void exists in one’s heart?  If one realizes the root of their void, they can only try to do things that will make this void less hurtful, manageable, but there is no way to absolutely fill this emptiness.  The mind holds onto memories, when in relationships the most heartfelt and once new experiences are the hardest to let go of.  The thought that the one lost will share the same experiences with someone else, truly hurts.

Vulnerability can be a crutch if it is one-sided in a relationship, If both people are vulnerable to each other, then it can be a beautiful thing.  Everyone is at risk of vulnerability in a relationship, so it is common to allow for this from time to time.  I think that is the essence of each relationship, if you go into relationships afraid of becoming vulnerable, then you are likely to fail.  You have to be vulnerable to change and growth within the relationship, it is essential to take risks in loving or things will hit a roadblock.

Truth be told, I believe that things become sour in relationships when one doubts the continual longevity of a relationship and become content that there will be an end.  Both people must live optimistically and rejoice in knowing that every argument you have should be a learning experience to make things better.  Too often people are willing to give up and try someone new, in hopes that the next person will be better.  This is absolutely the worst way to approach these matters, unless one is truly abused and used in ways of being disrespected.  Relationships fail to prosper when two people aren’t committed to the uninhibited pursuit to love endlessly.

When you are giving more in a relationship than the other, it is your choice to deal with what you are given.  Over time people grow and this may become more even than what it appears to be at the present moment.  This is the part where the individual evaluation needs to be taken in your relationship.  In some relationships one may give more emotionally, and the other gives more financially.  At some point things may turn around and it is patience that will make matters good.

I think being single is a choice, and dealing with someone who is not good for you in order to not be single is a bad choice.  I think most people date based on what they think they like, but if you have never tried what you think you don’t like, then clearly you don’t know if you will or will not like what you think you don’t.  From my experience I have realized that one can actually learn to love a person, just as well as one loves a particular type of person, just as well as one may think they are in love.  Learn to love more and value all the love given from others as this is something that is special.

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